Weird Week

Two weeks ago I went back to Weight Watchers. I finally decided it was time to go back one day when I was alone in the warehouse of the freight company I've been working for. I don't spend much time in the warehouse, but on this particular day I realized I was standing next to the cargo scale, so I stepped on it and weighed myself. I don't have a scale at home, so I've been worried that I've gained some of the weight back that I had lost. I was surprised that the scale registered even less than the last time I was weighed at WW. I realize that scales are sometimes quite a bit different, but it made me feel like at least I hadn't gained everything back, so I decided it was time to go back. I'm happy, and relieved to report that I lost even more since putting WW on hold. Since starting this blog, I've lost a total of 25 pounds.

The Weight Watchers program has changed since I was last there. It's still a points system, but the points are based on different nutritional values. I stayed after to get a synopsis of the new system, but the instructor basically told us to read the booklets and figure it out. I've been working 10-12 hour days, so haven't had much of a chance to figure it all out, but I will.

This past week has been a weird one at work. I was asked to train a new operations assistant. Keep in mind, I've only been there a little over two months, have never worked freight, and haven't been properly trained myself. This girl (more of a woman at 34 years old, but "girl" feels more fitting to call her) has worked quite a bit in freight, so except for specific company policies and operations, she already knows more than I do, at least that's what I had assumed, now I'm not so sure. The first day I trained her, which was Wednesday, it was very obvious to me that she didn't have much respect for me. At times she was condescending, and several times she went to talk to the station manager to ask him things because she didn't believe me. He always backed up exactly what I said, by the way. That's fine, I was more amused by it than anything. I assumed it was because she knows she has more experience in the industry than I do, but then something happened at the end of the day that gave me a different perspective.

I was working at my desk, and the new girl was on her way out, but had stopped to talk with the station manager for a few minutes. I could see them out of the corner of my eye, but I wasn't really paying too much attention to them, I was concentrating on trying to get caught up from having to train all day. I heard her say something about how good her brownies are and how she was going to make a pan and bring it to work, then she said, "She'll probably eat the whole pan," and I thought I saw her nod her head towards me. I thought to myself, "Did she really just say what I think she said?" so I glanced up and by the look on the station manager's face I knew...yep, she really said it.

There's so much I could say about that, but for now, this is all I've got: It's not the first time it's happened. Sometimes it's not as overt, but that prejudice, that disgust, is something I deal with all the time. In so many people's opinion, I'm not of value because I'm fat, and many of them see nothing wrong in voicing that opinion. That says a lot more about them than it does me.


Oh! And have a very Merry Christmas!